THE OMNISEX UNISEXUAL P U R I T Y T E S T ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Version 5.2 (1000) Final Release 15-Sept-1992 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Public domain; no copyright. All rights wronged, all wrongs reversed. Up with going down. The risen flesh commands; let there be love. Murphy's Law on sex; Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics. Chaste makes waste. Virginity can be cured. This document was not sponsored by the Department of Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, and was not monitored by the Air Force Avionics Laboratory. The views and conclusions contained in this document should not be interpreted as representing the official policies, either expressed or implied, of the Defense Advanced Projects Agency or the U.S. Government. Neither should it be inferred that the authors/contributors have actually performed any of the actions herein. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Disclaimer of Liability The user of this test acknowledges that sex is a hazardous sport; that a person must copulate in control, and use good judgment at all times; that partner's conditions vary constantly and are greatly affected by weather changes and previous use; and the dirty sheets, variations in terrain and bed surfaces, spouses/pimps/managers, forest growth, rocks and debris, clothed obstacles, and many other natural and man-made obstacles and hazards, including other users and customers, exist throughout the bedroom area. Personal managers(pimps/spouses) and sado-masochistic operations and equipment are constantly in use and may be hazardous to those not copulating in control. Impotence, collisions, and social diseases resulting in injury can happen at any time, even to those copulating in control with proper sexual equipment. Inherent risks are part of the sport and may exist within your partner. As a condition of being permitted to use the facilities of your partner, the user of this tests agrees to copulate in control and within the limits of his/her ability, and further acknowledges and accepts these hazards, dangers, and risks and assumes the risk of injury or loss to person or damage to property which might result from use of the partner's facilities. As a further condition of being permitted to use the facilities of your partners, the customer understands and further agrees that: (1) in the event of a transfer or use by another or anything else in the management's opinion is misconduct, misuse, kinky, impotence, or nuisance, this service may be revoked without refund; (2) the partner is the property of the harem and, upon request, he/she must be presented to any authorized representative of the pimp/spouse; (3) sexual equipment must be visibly displayed at all times when you are in any bedroom and when approaching the bed to copulate. Your sexual partner is not transferable; see the Theft of Services, V.S.A., sections 2581 and 2582. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Purity Test Genesis/History Version 1 (100) Created at MIT's Baker House. Two parallel versions: one for male, and one for female. Not much is known about this version. It was sported to CMU by ps in 1982. Version 2 (247) Spring 1983- CMU/jb, pd, kr, ps, ts, mt, et al. Expanded to 247 questions. This marked the beginning of the unisex versions. The story goes that they intended it to be 250 questions, but got tired that night and said, "We'll think of three more tomorrow," and tomorrow never got there. Version 3.3c.1 (400) on 05-Dec-1984 First formal release general of this test, version 3.xx. All former versions were short-lived and tended to be bug-ridden. Does not discriminate against gays or bi's. Good correspondence of scores (especially in the higher school ranges) between this version and version 2. Added Genesis/History section. Version 3.4 (400) on 29-jan-1985 Internal version; never released. Source code accidentally destroyed, much to the consternation of one of the authors. Cleaned up many bugs. Added sections: Disclaimer of Liability, Instructions for Use, Scoring, and Warranty Information. Version 3.5 (400) on 10-Apr-1985 Rebuilt from the 3.3c.1 source and the 3.4 (only surviving copy) Xerox X9700 laser printer hardcopy. Cleaned up some bugs in 3.4; wiped out a duplicate question. Added in verbose history section. Version 3.5A (400) on 13-Apr-1985: CMU/da, fa, tc, no, dt, sv, rz, et al. Found that we had 431 questions instead of 400. Version 3.5B (400) on 18-mar-1986: Yale (Pierson College)/as Intermediate release, with footnotes integrated into main body of text and some grammatical errors cleaned up. Begun in Fall, 1985; finished in April for the benefit of a friend at MIT (where it all began), who hadn't seen any versions except the antique Version 1. Version 3.5C (400) on 17-Jan-1988: Yale (Pierson College)/mmd (CLARINAET@YALEVM) Grammatical errors corrected. Introduction and history added. Version 4.0 (500) on 23-Apr-1988: Yale (Stillman College)/dfc, ad, dcg, mlm, and Dartmouth (Alpha Theta)/alb. Original 400-question version expanded to 500 questions. Transferred to LSC by jlf and smc. Donated to jlp from pct. Version 5.0 (576) date uncertain: orst.edu/ pdh. A late night remembrance of an antiquated purity test. Version 5.1 (1000) on 14-May-1990: orst.edu/ pdh. The 576 expanded with 1000 questions. Some impossible-to-do questions. (the undead?) Made without any of the additions of any previous Purity Tests. First true omnisex version same for girls and guys. Version 5.2 (1000) on 24-Aug-1992: LSMSA (Louisiana School for Math, Science, and the Arts)/"Gifties": Griffin, Phoenix, and Sickling. A rebuilding the PT1000 using the 1000 format and the PT500 questions. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Instructions for Use: This is a very long test consisting of 1000 questions. It starts out tame and gets progressively worse (or better, depending on your viewpoint). There are many ways of going about taking this test. You can, of course, as your right, guaranteed by the Constitution, be anti-social and sequester yourself in your room and take this test all by yourself; however, we feel that the funnest way to utilize is to hold a Purity /test Party. All you need is one copy of the test, and a bunch of friends. (Lots of writing implements and paper would be useful too.) The person with the copy of the test is the test administrator; he/she reads the questions out loud and everybody else writes down their answers. We have no definite rules as to whether the participants are required to divulge their answers; that is up to the group to decide. However, each person's purity score should be made common knowledge. (The person with the lowest score gets to be giggled at for the rest of his/her life.) This works great at parties and lets everyone know who's easy and who isn't, so you'll know who to go home with. Don't leave home without it. Definitions: All questions in this test pertain to events that have happened to you subsequent to your weaning and babyhood/infancy. Anything that may have happened before that time is considered not standing and void. Also, for the section of the test which involves animals, humans (although they really are animals) do not count. The term mutual masturbation refers to someone masturbating you AND/OR you masturbating someone else, not exclusively both at the same time. Necking is the kissing or stroking of a person's head or neck. Petting is that plus the caressing or fondling of other portions of anatomy; through or underneath clothing. We would also like to define having sex in the homosexual case; homosexual sex has occurred when both partners are of the same sex and one partner has an orgasm while there is some contact between the genitals of both partners. We would now like to bring to your attention that there is no passing nor failing score. Therefore, one really shouldn't worry too much about getting a high score... even if you do get giggled at for the rest of your life. ---ALL TECHNICALITIES COUNT--- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Section 1: The Virgin Stuff. Have you ever done any of the following: 1. hugged somebody? 2. kissed a friend or stranger as a friendly gesture? 3. stolen a kiss? 4. kissed and told? 5. held hands with someone? 6. been on a date? 7. been on a date that lasted until after one a. m. the next morning? 8. gone to a scary movie as an excuse to get close to someone? 9. stood someone up? 10. been stood up? 11. dated someone on a regular basis? 12. gone steady? 13. slow danced? 14. slam danced? 15. copped a feel while slow dancing? 16. had the symptoms of Russian fingers (rushin' fingers)? 17. had the symptoms of Roman hands (roamin' hands)? 18. played doctor? 19. french kissed? 20. necked? 21. been interrupted by the police while necking (were they more embarrassed than you were)? 22. directly asked someone whom you were not going out with and had never gone out with if they were a virgin? 23. told somebody something "for their own good"? 24. flirted? 25. flirted with someone who was related to you? (sister, cousin, in-law, etc.) 26. hit on someone even though they were engaged, married, or otherwise taken? 27. used physical strength, physical power, or any physical prowess, or prowesslessness as a factor in pick-up, get-to-know-you-better routine? 28. used tickling as a pick-up, get-to-know-you-better-routine? 29. been picked up? 30. picked someone up? 31. picked up sailors (marines, soldiers)? 32. affected an accent to aid pickup lines? 33. secretly lusted after someone without that person knowing? 34. dropped subtle hints to someone you liked/loved/wanted, hoping that they would pick up on it? 35. written anonymous "love letters" to someone? (secret admirer, etc. That is, dropped some not-so-subtle hints) 36. bundled (shared a bed, sleeping bag, or sleeping accommodations with someone of your prefered sex without anything steamy happening)? 37. broken your word, promise, or vow? 38. told someone that you loved them when you did not? 39. told someone that you loved them strictly because you wanted to have sex with them? 40. lied to someone at someone else's request? 41. lied about your sexual preference in order to avoid a date? 42. done something that you don't want someone to know about (parents, employer, boy/girlfriend, spouse, roommate)? 43. done something that you are too embarrassed to talk about? 44. played footsie or 'kneesie'? 45. played footsie or 'kneesie' with someone not your date, significant other or spouse? 46. attempted to corrupt someone's morals? 47. attempted to corrupt someone's morals and discover it is too late? 48. questioned someone about their sex life when they were incapable of not answering (e. g. they were truly wasted, or talking in their sleep)? 49. questioned a significant other about their sex life when they were incapable of not answering? 50. used whatever they said against them? 51. been told that you were/are a bore? 52. been bar hopping? 53. been to a cocktail party? 54. slept in your undies? 55. slept in the nude? 56. slept in class or while on watch? 57. disturbed others by snoring? (classroom, business meeting, etc.) 58. photocopied parts of your body? (face, hands, feet) 59. photocopied personal portions of your anatomy (tits, ass or genitals)? 60. given your kids unusual names (Shanda Lear, Laurel Ann Hardy, Dweezle)? 61. dyed your hair an outrageous color (deliberately)? 62. shaved your head? 63. uttered/muttered/yelled/screamed (or in other words, verbally expressed) obscenities? 64. used 'fuck' or 'shit' as a noun, adverb, adjective, pronoun, infix, suffix, prefix or prepositional article in a sentence? 65. cussed in your sleep? 66. ever been reprimanded (punished) for verbally expressing obscenities? 67. skipped class or work? 68. skipped class/work with teacher/boss? 69. been in military service? 70. made an unregistered explosive device (a bomb)? 71. used an unregistered explosive device? 72. gossiped? 73. written graffiti? 74. plagiarized? 75. shoplifted? 76. stolen? 77. traded on inside information? 78. attempted to commit suicide? 79. had a fake id? 80. made fake id? 81. sent a chain letter? 82. started a chain letter? 83. made or acquired 'elint' (electronic intelligence) equipment (bugs)? 84. installed or used 'elint' equipment (wiretaps, tape recorders, etc.)? 85. removed the tag that says "do not remove under penalty of law"? 86. rode public transportation w/o paying? 87. pistol whipped someone? 88. carried concealed weapons? 89. evaded taxes? 90. evaded custom duties by not declaring something subject to a duty or tax? 91. driven over the legal speed limit? 92. drag raced (on the street)? 93. driven without a license? 94. bought or sold anything on a black market? 95. used bootleg/pirated/underground software? 96. plotted felony? 97. been a pool, card or chess shark? 98. incited a riot? 99. plotted a coup (civic class doesn't count)? 100. committed sedition (plotting to overthrow the government)? 101. committed treason? 102. looted, pillaged, plundered, or burned (The Barbarian Pentathlon; Barbarians can't count)? 103. made out a check that bounced? 104. welshed on a bet or wager? 105. offered sexual favors as payoff for a wager? 106. offered another's sexual favors as payoff for your wager? 107. used someone else's credit card without their knowledge and/or consent? 108. committed breaking and entering? 109. seen a snuff film? 110. plotted conspiracy? 111. plotted to murder someone? 112. committed murder? 113. been arrested (Picture taken and all that wonderful, free stuff?) 114. read someone else's diary without their knowledge and/or consent? 115. searched someone else's room without their knowledge and or consent? 116. hired someone more for their looks? 117. been attracted to someone more by an article of their clothing than by their body? 118. asked someone to wear a particular article of clothing not because it was 'sexy' but because it turned you on? 119. worn clothing that was "revealing" (either of your figure, or that emphasized 'strategic' locations)? 120. worn clothing that you didn't know was THAT revealing (like the seat has ripped out or such)? 121. gone for more than one day in the same set of underwear? 122. been in public without wearing underwear? 123. disrobed in public? 124. been a member of a nude colony? 125. been to a nude beach? 126. sunned your buns or tanned your can? 127. walked around your room/apartment/house/habitation in the nude? (Must be a serious walk; five minutes of going around trying to find your undies after a shower doesn't count.) 128. walked around in a public or semi-public area with a top (shirt, T-shirt, etc.) but no bottoms (pants, shorts, etc.)? (Dorm hallways, lobby areas, etc. are acceptable; however, locker rooms, bathrooms, and such places where this behavior is acceptable do not count.) 129. mooned somebody? 130. mooned or flashed someone from the front? 131. streaked, flashed, or otherwise exposed pretty much totally yourself in public before an informal, unofficial gathering of people? 132. streaked, flashed, or otherwise exposed pretty much totally yourself in public before a formal (official) gathering of people? (Such as for a function, stage performance, charity dinner, etc.?) 133. posed nude or semi nude for private drawings, paintings or photographs as a 'favor'? 134. posed nude or semi nude in public (e. g. art classes) as a 'favor'? 135. posed as a model for purposes of erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit art? 136. asked someone to pose nude or semi nude for private drawings, paintings or photographs as a 'favor'? 137. asked someone to pose nude or semi nude in public (e. g. art classes) as a 'favor'? 138. asked someone to pose for erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit art or photographs? 139. served cheap booze? 140. passed cheap booze as the expensive stuff? 141. fed someone dogfood? 142. eaten dogfood? 143. not paid your library fines? 144. instigated a raid (panty or otherwise)? 145. watched Benny Hill, Monty Python, Dr. Ruth, Donahue, Geraldo or Oprah? 146. watched primetime soaps? 147. been to a bar? 148. been to a gay bar? 149. been to a leather/biker bar? 150. been in or started a food fight? 151. started a fight? 152. started a bar fight? 153. started a brawl? 154. been to a rock concert? 155. been to a heavy metal concert? 156. listened to acid rock? 157. listened to acid rock while on acid? 158. been a groupie? 159. been a roadie? 160. thought about starting a band to meet groupies? 161. thought about starting a band to get good dope? 162. told someone you were with the band? 163. told someone you were with the band, and it worked? 164. played records backwards to hear the secret messages? 165. found the secret message recorded backwards on an album? 166. sung dirty songs, the kind with no subtlety in the lyrics (e.g. Let's get drunk and Screw)? 167. been sad because someone you knew was getting married? 168. been sad because someone you knew was getting married and now you'd never get to sleep with them? 169. wanted something or someone that someone else has, simply because they have it and you don't (coveted)? 170. helped to cover for someone's escapades (provide alibi, accommodations, opportunity)? 171. been besieged by someone who thought they could satisfy you and make an honest person of you? 172. been nicknamed for a behavior pattern of yours ('Sleepy')? 173. been nicknamed for an aberrant behavior pattern of yours ('Sleazy', 'Sickling')? 174. had your ears pierced? 175. pierced someone else's ears? 176. worn body paint? 177. worn obscene or suggestive t-shirts? 178. worn t-shirts with obscene or graphic messages in a language you didn't read? 179. been to a funeral as a form of entertainment (ala Harold of "Harold & Maude")? Section 2: Auto-erotica and Mono-sexualism. 180. been overcome by celibacy and didn't like it? 181. entered a bathroom of the opposite sex, unaccompanied by someone of the opposite sex, while not involved in a search and/or rescue mission? 182. do you have a tattoo? 183. do you have an 'obscene' tattoo (words or pictures)? 184. do you have a tattoo normally concealed by your clothing (George Shultz has a tiger on his butt)? 185. do you have a tattoo in an intimate location? 186. do you have a tattoo normally concealed by your pubic hair? 187. pissed on an electric fence? 188. used an inflatable doll? 189. humped an inanimate object like a pillow, (dinner) liver, hole in the wall, sausage, banana, etc.? 190. had sex with a dead person? 191. given oral sex to a dead person? 192. bought or made a codpiece or padded bra? 193. worn a codpiece or padded bra? (i.e. stuffed your bra if you are female; stuffed your pants if you are male) 194. stolen the underwear of someone you knew, for a purpose other than that of a practical joke or to just ire the person? (A bunch of guys invading the women's dorm on a mission of panty raids does not count.) 195. intentionally taken someone's underwear and didn't know who it belonged to? 196. owned an underwear collection of underwear not belonging to you? 197. bought lingerie/undergarments of the opposite sex? 198. cross-dressed in the *undergarments* of the opposite sex for a sexual purpose? (This means that school plays, initiations, and the like don't count) 199. cross-dressed in the *undergarments* of the opposite sex for a sexual purpose in the presence of 1 or more other people? (Plays and the like still don't count-this is for a sexual purpose) 200. stuffed your pants or bra while cross-dressed for your sexual purpose? 201. worn any groinal underwear on your head? (Panties, jock-strap, etc.) 202. eaten, sucked, licked, nibbled, or otherwise inserted used, unwashed piece of groinal underwear into your mouth while said underwear was not being worn? 203. deliberately sniffed or smelled a used, unwashed piece of groinal underwear while it was not being worn at the time? 204. been gagged with someone's underwear? (not your own) 205. had your head inserted into a urinal or toilet bowl willingly? (Doing this in a pristine, show-room model doesn't count) 206. played in or with shit? 207. willingly urinated on the garments that you were wearing at the time? (In other words: piss in your pants; wet yourself; had an accident.) 208. willingly urinated on any part of your body? 209. urinated in a cup, bottle, or pitcher or any such receptacle that was not originally designed for such purpose? Urinalysis incidents don't count. 210. urinated anywhere other than a bathroom, outhouse, tree, bush or any commonly accepted piss hole? (in the kitchen sink, in the glove compartment of the family car...) 211. urinated from higher that the fifth floor or equivalent height, above ground level, out of a building, or off a bridge or any such permanent structure? (e.g. the Grand Canyon) 212. willingly defecated on the garments that you were wearing at the time? (In other words: shit in your pants; had a serious accident.) 213. willingly defecated on yourself? 214. defecated anywhere other than a bathroom, outhouse, or any commonly accepted shit hole? (Camping/hiking trips in which bathroom/outhouse access is nil do not count) 215. stored any excreta in a refrigerator, oven, or any food storage/ preparation appliance? 216. stored evacuated excreta anywhere else in your room, apartment, house, habitation, office, etc.? 217. scratched and sniffed any erotic catalog? 218. had an arousing dream? (Wet dreams and the like.) 219. read or bought pornographic periodicals? 220. read or bought pornographic material that might be described as really gross or kinky? 221. had a subscription to pornographic periodicals? ('Sickos', alt.sex) 222. written erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit literature (lust letters count)? 223. had any story or fantasy you wrote published in any pornographic periodical? ('Sickos' and alt.sex are porno. periodicals) 224. read any sexually explicit literature? 225. read classic pornographic books (Candy, Fanny Hill, Naked Came the Stranger)? 226. been bored while reading erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit literature? 227. misspelled 'dirty' words, or misspelled other words as 'dirty' words? 228. read any sex manuals (e. g. Joy of Sex, Everything you always wanted to Know about Sex)? 229. read anything by the Marquis de Sade? 230. read the Kama Sutra? 231. underlined or marked the 'dirty' parts of any literature? 232. made an obscene phone call anonymously (to someone you didn't know)? 233. received an anonymous obscene phone call? 234. phoned up any recorded phone sex numbers? (e.g. (212)976-2626, (212)976-2727, (212)976-2828, etc. Please note that these are fifty cent calls in addition to toll charges and long distance charges.) 235. called any live sex numbers? 236. recorded an obscene call for later playback? 237. fantasized about your long-term instructor, mentor, or someone who is superior to you? (One day skydiving teachers, or two hour ski instructors and the such do not count.) 238. fantasized about your lawyer, doctor, nurse, psychiatrist, or someone with whom you are having a professional relationship? 239. fantasized about someone you know personally but not closely? 240. masturbated? 241. fantasized about anyone and masturbated at the same time? 242. fantasized while masturbating that you were of the opposite sex? 243. written down your own stories or fantasies for masturbatory purposes? 244. masturbated more than four times in 24 hours? 245. masturbated on a regular basis (more than once a week)? 246. masturbated to orgasm? 247. masturbated while reading either pornographic or sexually explicit materials? 248. masturbated while reading a (non-sexually explicit) textbook? 249. masturbated while watching an R or X rated movie in private (cable, videotape, or film)? 250. masturbated while watching an R or X rated movie in public (a theater)? 251. masturbated where you could have been discovered? (In a crowd, in public, city parks, gym/dorm/barrack showers, movie theater, etc.) 252. masturbated in the wilds or in nature with no nearby civilization? 253. masturbated while driving a *moving* land vehicle? (car, RV, truck, motorcycle, hearse, etc.) 254. masturbated while on the phone? (No kinky interpretations of "on the phone." This is legit.) 255. masturbated while in a bathroom of the opposite sex? 256. masturbated using aid of food? 257. eaten the food used in masturbation after masturbation? 258. used a mechanical hand-holdable device in aiding or replacing masturbation? (Vibrator, massager, Dust-Buster, vacuum cleaner, etc.) 259. used a bowling pin, Coke[tm] bottle, or something along those general shapes for masturbatory or sexual purposes? 260. been "caught" masturbating? 261. been afraid you were slipping into monogamy? 262. practiced autoerotic asphyxia (oxygen deprivation for sexual enhancement)? 263. received an enema for a purpose other than that of medical? 264. received an enema consisting of a non-normal enema solution (wine, beer, urine, windex)? 265. wished you were a homosexual of the opposite sex? 266. wished you were a heterosexual of the opposite sex? 267. had a friend of the opposite sex that you traded clothes with? 268. had a sex change operation? 269. gone skinny dipping alone? 270. shaved your genital pubic hair? 271. shaved your genital pubic hair on a fairly regular basis? 272. colored or bleached your genital pubic hair? 273. shaved or shaped your genital pubic hair in a particular design? (moons, hearts, diamonds, clovers, etc.) 274. bought blatant sexual objects? (This means that if you buy a bottle of Coke[tm] and use it as a dildo, it really doesn't count. Think: design and function.) 275. Owned any erotic art pieces? (Like that phallic symbol in the catwoman scene in "A Clockwork Orange.") 276. sculpted erotic/obscene artworks in food? (bananas, carrots, apples...) 277. eaten any erotic food items? (Chocolate tits, banana dicks, etc.) 278. sculpted erotic-obscene artworks in soap, wood, or any other carveable material that isn't food? 279. made an X or R-Rated snowman or snowwoman? 280. inserted your finger into your rectum? 281. used ben-wa balls or anal beads? (ben-wa balls: a pair of small, usually metal, balls which are placed into the vagina or anus and are supposed to feel good as they move around. Anal beads: a string of beads inserted into the anus which is supposed to feel good as it is pulled out.) 282. given ben-wa balls, a vibrator, or other sex toy? 283. received ben-wa balls, a vibrator, or other sex toy? 284. performed oral sex on yourself? (yes, this is possible for most males, and even some females.) Section 3: Male Relations. All of the following questions refer to what you have done with a male. 285. held hands, kissed, or otherwise displayed public affection with a man? 286. been propositioned by a man for necking or petting? 287. been propositioned by a man for any sexual practice? 288. been pinched or patted on the buttocks by a man? 289. been kissed below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 290. received a hickey (or had the attempt if you are hard to get)? 291. received a hickey in an intimate location? (upper, inner thigh counts) 292. received scratch marks or nail marks? 293. been bitten or nibbled upon? 294. been bitten in an intimate location? 295. had a man fondle or stroke your clothed legs? 296. had a man fondle or stroke your clothed body? 297. had a man stroke or fondle your clothed breast or nipples? 298. had a man pet, stroke, fondle or otherwise handle your covered genitals? 299. had a man fondle or stroke your bare legs? 300. had a man fondle or stroke your bare body? 301. had a man stroke or fondle your bare breast or nipples? 302. had a man pet, stroke, fondle or otherwise handle your bare genitals? 303. propositioned a man for necking or petting? 304. propositioned a man for any sexual practice? 305. pinched or patted a man's buttocks? 306. kissed a man below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 307. petted above the waist? 308. petted below the waist? 309. given a hickey? 310. given a hickey in an intimate location? (upper, inner thigh counts) 311. left scratches or nail marks? 312. left teeth marks? 313. left teeth marks in an intimate location? 314. fondled or stroked a man's clothed legs? 315. fondled or stroked a man's clothed body? 316. stroked or fondled a man's clothed breast or nipple? 317. petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled a man's covered genitals? 318. fondled or stroked a man's bare legs? 319. fondled or stroked a man's bare body? 320. stroked or fondled a man's bare breast or nipple? 321. petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled a man's bare genitals? 322. been involved with pelvic thrusting while clothed? 323. had you fingers licked or sucked? 324. licked or sucked a man's fingers? 325. had your ear, or ear region licked, breathed upon, sucked or nibbled? 326. licked, breathed onto, sucked or nibbled a man's ear or ear region? 327. fondled a man who was asleep? 328. woken up being fondled? 329. had sex with a man who was asleep and he didn't wake up? 330. had sex with a man who was asleep and he did wake up? 331. slept through sexual activity (him doing it to you)? 332. woken up in the midst of a man having sexual activity with you? 333. given a man a backrub or massage with no ulterior motives? 334. given a man a backrub or massage with ulterior motives? 335. given a man backrub or massage with ulterior motives and it worked? 336. been petted to orgasm? 337. petted to orgasm? 338. given oral sex to a man? 339. gagged when he came in your mouth? 340. received oral sex? 341. performed mutual oral sex ('69')? 342. performed mutual masturbation? 343. watched while a man masturbated? 344. had a man watch while you masturbated? 345. orgasmed in or on him? 346. had him orgasm in you? 347. had him orgasm on you? 348. kissed a man (or boy) on a first date? 349. necked with a man (or boy) on a first date? 350. petted with a man (or boy) on a first date? 351. had oral sex on a first date? 352. given oral sex on a first date? 353. had sex on a first date? 354. had oral sex instead of intercourse? 355. been seen naked under good lighting by a man (note: nude is expected (e. g. in a shower room or at a nude beach), naked is when you didn't expect to be seen (e. g. in the bathroom). )? 356. seen a man naked under good lighting? 357. undressed under good lighting, knowing a man was watching you? 358. been unable to be in a man's company while both of you were nude without anything steamy happening? 359. bathed or showered with a man? 360. let a man wash you when you were perfectly capable of doing it yourself? 361. washed a man who was perfectly capable of washing himself? 362. had sex while in the shower? 363. had sex while taking a bath? 364. had sex with a virgin (not yourself)? 365. drawn blood by scratching during sex? 366. drawn blood by biting during sex? (hickeys do not count as having drawn blood) 367. bled from his scratching during sex? 368. bled from his biting during sex? (again, hickeys do not count) Section 4: Female Relations. All of the following questions refer to what you have done with a female. 369. held hands, kissed, or otherwise displayed public affection with a woman? 370. been propositioned by a woman for necking or petting? 371. been propositioned by a woman for any sexual practice? 372. been pinched or patted on the buttocks by a woman? 373. been kissed below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 374. received a hickey (or had the attempt if you are hard to get)? 375. received a hickey in an intimate location? (upper, inner thigh counts) 376. received scratch marks or nail marks? 377. been bitten or nibbled upon? 378. been bitten in an intimate location? 379. had a woman fondle or stroke your clothed legs? 380. had a woman fondle or stroke your clothed body? 381. had a woman stroke or fondle your clothed breast or nipples? 382. had a woman pet, stroke, fondle or otherwise handle your covered genitals? 383. had a woman fondle or stroke your bare legs? 384. had a woman fondle or stroke your bare body? 385. had a woman stroke or fondle your bare breast or nipples? 386. had a woman pet, stroke, fondle or otherwise handle your bare genitals? 387. propositioned a woman for necking or petting? 388. propositioned a woman for any sexual practice? 389. pinched or patted a woman's buttocks? 390. kissed a woman below the neck, but not on the hands and arms? 391. petted above the waist? 392. petted below the waist? 393. given a hickey? 394. given a hickey in an intimate location? (upper, inner thigh counts) 395. left scratches or nail marks? 396. left teeth marks? 397. left teeth marks in an intimate location? 398. fondled or stroked a woman's clothed legs? 399. fondled or stroked a woman's clothed body? 400. stroked or fondled a woman's clothed breast or nipple? 401. petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled a woman's covered genitals? 402. fondled or stroked a woman's bare legs? 403. fondled or stroked a woman's bare body? 404. stroked or fondled a woman's bare breast or nipple? 405. petted, stroked, fondled, or otherwise handled a woman's bare genitals? 406. been involved with pelvic thrusting while clothed? 407. had you fingers licked or sucked? 408. licked or sucked a woman's fingers? 409. had your ear, or ear region licked, breathed upon, sucked or nibbled? 410. licked, breathed onto, sucked or nibbled a woman's ear or ear region? 411. fondled a woman who was asleep? 412. woken up being fondled? 413. had sex with a woman who was asleep and she didn't wake up? 414. had sex with a woman who was asleep and she did wake up? 415. slept through sexual activity (her doing it to you)? 416. woken up in the midst of a woman having sexual activity with you? 417. given a woman a backrub or massage with no ulterior motives? 418. given a woman a backrub or massage with ulterior motives? 419. given a woman backrub or massage with ulterior motives and it worked? 420. been petted to orgasm? 421. petted to orgasm? 422. given oral sex to a woman? 423. gagged when she came? (a non-tasty treat) 424. received oral sex? 425. performed mutual oral sex ('69')? 426. performed mutual masturbation? 427. watched while a woman masturbated? 428. had a woman watch while you masturbated? 429. orgasmed in her? 430. orgasmed on her? 431. had her orgasm in or on you? 432. kissed a woman (or girl) on a first date? 433. necked with a woman (or girl) on a first date? 434. petted with a woman (or girl) on a first date? 435. had oral sex on a first date? 436. given oral sex on a first date? 437. had sex on a first date? 438. had oral sex instead of intercourse? 439. been seen naked under good lighting by a woman (note: nude is expected (e. g. in a shower room or at a nude beach), naked is when you didn't expect to be seen (e. g. in the bathroom). )? 440. seen a woman naked under good lighting? 441. undressed under good lighting, knowing a woman was watching you? 442. been unable to be in a woman's company while both of you were nude without anything steamy happening? 443. bathed or showered with a woman? 444. let a woman wash you when you were perfectly capable of doing it yourself? 445. washed a woman who was perfectly capable of washing herself? 446. had sex while in the shower? 447. had sex while taking a bath? 448. had sex with a virgin (not yourself)? 449. drawn blood by scratching during sex? 450. drawn blood by biting during sex? (hickeys do not count as having drawn blood) 451. bled from her scratching during sex? 452. bled from her biting during sex? (again, hickeys do not count) Section 5: Group Relations. 453. administered a whole Purity Test or are in the process of administering a whole Purity Test of any version? (That's where you are the test administrator in a Purity Test Party. See "Instructions for Use" for further information.) 454. taken Purity Tests of any version more than 5 times? 455. lied on any previous Purity Tests? 456. had an unauthorized crib sheet for a test? 457. been jealous of someone else's Purity Test score? 458. been impressed by someone else's Purity Test score? 459. become interested in someone only after hearing their Purity Test score? 460. used the Purity Test as a checklist of things you could do? 461. ever done something for the sole purpose of lowering your Purity Test score? 462. participated in Purity Testing with an ulterior motive? 463. exaggerated about any sexual experiences? 464. taken someone someplace to be seen in their company? 465. taken someone someplace to be seen in their company by someone in particular? 466. worn specific clothes for the purpose of hiding hickeys? (i.e., turtlenecks)? 467. gone to (or escorted someone to) a Planned Parenthood Clinic? (for an exam, to obtain birth control pills, diaphragm,etc.) 468. been a member of a fraternity or sorority? 469. picked your nose in public? 470. farted (audibly) in mixed company? 471. listened to dirty jokes in mixed company? 472. told dirty jokes in mixed company? 473. hot tubbed in mixed company? (jacuzzi or hydropool) 474. hot tubbed in the nude? 475. hot tubbed in the nude in mixed company? 476. been groped under the water while hot tubbing? 477. groped someone under the water while hot tubbing? 478. saunaed or steam bathed in mixed company? 479. saunaed or steam bathed in the nude? 480. saunaed or steam bathed in the nude in mixed company? 481. gone skinny dipping in mixed company? 482. put suntan lotion, cocoa butter, or baby oil on someone? (not necessarily at a beach or pool...) 483. had someone put suntan lotion, cocoa butter, or baby oil on you? 484. discussed masturbation? (Bringing up the topic of masturbation during the Purity Test does not cut it as discussed masturbation.) 485. been a participant in a Who's-Physically-Better-Equipped verification contest? (Contestants must be of the same gender; spectators, judges, umpires, and verifiers may be of different genders.) 486. been a judge in a contest such as above? 487. played post office (or other kissing game)? 488. played pony express (post office with more horsing around)? 489. played a game in which it may require you or others to disrobe? 490. deliberately lost a game which required the removal of clothing (folding with four aces)? 491. played a game in which it may require you or others to perform an action on another participant? (Truth-or-Dare) 492. played naked Twister[tm] (with or without oil)? 493. been in intimate contact with more than one person at the same time while all of you were nude? 494. had oral sex with more than 10 people? (not necessarily at one time) 495. had sex with more than 10 people? (not necessarily at one time) 496. had sex with more than 1 person in a 24 hour period? 497. had sex with both genders in a 24 hour period? 498. been in a menage-a-trios with all members of the same sex? 499. been in a menage-a-trios with at least one person of the opposite sex? 500. had sex or oral sex with a person and his/her parent? (not necessarily at the same time.) 501. had sex, oral sex, mutual masturbation, necking, or petting with a person and his/her sibling? (not necessarily at the same time) 502. been involved in a two (or more) in one? (oral & anal or vaginal & anal counts. But no fingers-we're talking the real thing here.) 503. been involved in a gang bang? (Step right up; come and get it while it's hot.) 504. been in a circle of fuck? 505. been in a 69 circle? 506. been to a (cooking, baby, Wesson) oil party? 507. participated in a homosexual orgy or group sex? (four or more people; partners must be exchanged.) 508. participated in a heterosexual orgy or group sex? (four or more people; partners must be exchanged.) 509. participated in a bisexual orgy or group sex? (four or more people; partners must be exchanged.) 510. propositioned a person or group of people for group sex? 511. been propositioned for group sex? 512. participated in a Fuck-A-Thon? (Where the object is to see how many times you can do it in a certain amount of time.) 513. had dates with more than one person in one night while one or more of the people involved were NOT aware of your actions? 514. gone steady with two or more people at the same time while one or more of the people involved were NOT aware of what you were doing? 515. gone steady with two or more people at the same time while all of them WERE aware of what you were doing? 516. urinated on someone else intentionally? (Piss fights!) 517. been involved in a golden shower? 518. made lewd, licentious or suggestive gestures while dancing in public? 519. eaten food in a provocative manner? (bananas, Jello, etc.) 520. discussed oral sex techniques (In general, not as part of a lesson)? 521. been given lessons in oral sex techniques? (not lecture, just lab) 522. given lessons in oral sex techniques ('Pay attention, I'm only going to do this once. . . !')? 523. demonstrated oral sex techniques with a 'visual aid' (carrot, cucumber, Coke bottle)? 524. demonstrated oral sex techniques on an assistant? 525. demonstrated oral sex techniques for more than one person at a time? 526. worn or used a condom, or any feminine hygiene contraption that has already been used by someone else? 527. seen any burlesque show? (Rocky Horror counts) 528. participated in a Rocky Horror Picture Show production (costume etc.)? 529. been to a peep show? 530. been to a live sex show? 531. been to a erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit movie? 532. been to a private showing of a erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit movie (The classic 'stag' party, even if you're female)? 533. held a private showing of an erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit movie? 534. shown erotic, pornographic or sexually explicit movies or videos to get someone in the mood? 535. adjusted your genitals in public (you'd think they'd be set at the factory)? Section 6: Locality. 536. necked while hot tubbing? 537. had oral sex while hot tubbing? 538. had sex while hot tubbing? 539. in a sauna or steam bath, ever necked? 540. in a sauna or steam bath had oral sex? 541. in a sauna or steam bath had sex? 542. necked/petted in a place of religion? 543. had oral sex in a place of religion? 544. had sex in a place of religion? 545. necked/petted in a movie theater? 546. had oral sex during a movie? 547. had sex during a movie? 548. necked/petted in a sports area (stadium, court, track, or ballfield)? 549. had oral sex in a sports area? 550. had sex in a sports area? 551. necked/petted in a stationary vehicle of less than 3000 pounds GWT (a car or small pickup)? 552. had oral sex in a stationary vehicle of less than 3000 pounds GWT? 553. had sex in a stationary vehicle of less than 3000 pounds GWT? 554. in a stationary vehicle of more than 3000 pounds GWT (a van, pickup), necked/petted? 555. in a stationary vehicle of more than 3000 pounds GWT, had oral sex? 556. in a stationary vehicle of more than 3000 pounds GWT, had sex? 557. necked/petted in a moving vehicle of less than 3000 pounds GWT (a car or small pickup)? 558. had oral sex in a moving vehicle of less than 3000 pounds GWT? 559. had sex in a moving vehicle of less than 3000 pounds GWT? 560. in a moving vehicle of more than 3000 pounds GWT (a van, pickup), necked/petted? 561. in a moving vehicle of more than 3000 pounds GWT, had oral sex? 562. in a moving vehicle of more than 3000 pounds GWT, had sex? 563. necked/petted with the operator of a moving vehicle? 564. given oral sex with the operator of a moving vehicle? 565. had sex with the operator of a moving vehicle? 566. as the operator of a moving vehicle, necked/petted? 567. as the operator of a moving vehicle, received oral sex? 568. as the operator of a moving vehicle, had sex? 569. had oral sex in a vehicle with people around? (at a red light, traffic jam, McDonald's parking lot, etc.) 570. had sex in a vehicle with people around? 571. necked/petted on horseback (just don't scare the horses)? 572. had oral sex on horseback? 573. had sex on horseback? 574. necked/petted on a train? 575. had oral sex on a train? 576. had sex on a train? 577. necked/petted at a public event? (rock concert, rally, riot, etc.) 578. had oral sex at a public event? 579. had sex at a public event? 580. necked/petted in a wind driven water vehicle (Sailboat, windsurfer)? 581. had oral sex in a wind driven water vehicle? 582. had sex in a wind driven water vehicle? 583. necked or petted in a water based, motor driven transport medium LESS THAN 80 feet in length? (Yacht, PT boat, bass boat, etc.) 584. had oral sex in a water based, motor driven transport medium LESS THAN 80 feet in length? 585. had sex in a water based, motor driven transport medium LESS THAN 80 feet in length? 586. necked or petted in a water based, motor driven transport medium MORE THAN 80 feet in length? (cruiseship, battleship, aircraft carrier, nuclear submarine, etc.) 587. had oral sex in a water based, motor driven transport medium MORE THAN 80 feet in length? 588. had sex in a water based, motor driven transport medium MORE THAN 80 feet in length? 589. necked/petted in an aircraft not in flight? 590. had oral sex in an aircraft not in flight? 591. had sex in an aircraft not in flight? 592. necked/petted in an aircraft in flight? 593. had oral sex in an aircraft in flight? 594. had sex in an aircraft in flight? 595. necked/petted on public transportation (bus, subway, tram or trolley)? 596. had oral sex on public transportation? 597. had sex on public transportation? 598. necked/petted in a library? 599. had oral sex in a library? 600. had sex in a library? 601. necked/petted in a place of the dead (morgue, cemetery, mortuary, crypt, etc.)? 602. had oral sex in a place of the dead? 603. had sex in a place of the dead? 604. necked or petted in a contraption of the dead? (Coffin, hearse, body bag, etc.) 605. had oral sex in a contraption of the dead? 606. had sex in a contraption of the dead? 607. necked/petted in/on a construction site (house, office, launch platform, etc.)? 608. had oral sex in/on a construction site? 609. had sex in/on a construction site? 610. necked/petted in a telephone booth, voting booth, automatic photograph taker, closet, or any such small, non-moving enclosure that was not designed for such activities? 611. had oral sex in such enclosure? 612. had sex in such enclosure? 613. necked/petted in an elevator, people-mover, escalator, dumbwaiter or any building-internal people moving device? 614. had oral sex in an elevator, people-mover, escalator, dumbwaiter or any building-internal people moving device? 615. had sex in an elevator, people-mover, escalator, dumbwaiter or any building-internal people moving device? 616. necked/petted on the roof of a building in excess of 5 floors? 617. had oral sex on the roof of a building in excess of 5 floors? 618. had sex on the roof of a building in excess of 5 floors? 619. necked/petted in a place where you could have been discovered? 620. had oral sex in a place where you could have been discovered? 621. had sex in a place where you could have been discovered? 622. necked/petted in the wilds or in nature with no nearby civilization? 623. had oral sex in the wilds or in nature with no nearby civilization? 624. had sex in the wilds or in nature with no nearby civilization? 625. necked/petted in the snow? 626. had oral sex in the snow? 627. had sex in the snow (now that's fucking cold!)? 628. necked/petted in a place where the prevailing ambient temperature (of the air immediately surrounding you) was below the freezing point of water? 629. had oral sex in a place where the prevailing ambient temperature was below the freezing point of water? 630. had sex in a place where the prevailing ambient temperature was below the freezing point of water? 631. necked/petted in a free flowing body of water (river, lake, swimming pool, ocean)? 632. had oral sex in a free flowing body of water? 633. had sex in a free flowing body of water? 634. necked/petted under a natural shower of running water (as in waterfalls, torrential downpour, monsoons, etc.)? 635. had oral sex under a natural shower of running water? 636. had sex under a natural shower of running water? 637. necked/petted in a tree but not in a tree house or similar structure? 638. had oral sex in a tree but not in a tree house or similar structure? 639. had sex in a tree but not in a tree house or similar structure? 640. necked/petted on a suspension device of any kind? (hammock, trampoline, tightrope, safety net, etc.) 641. had oral sex on a suspension device of any kind? 642. had sex on a suspension device of any kind? 643. necked/petted inside or within the confines of a hedge, bush, or other natural vegetation which can provide a wall effect? 644. had oral sex within such confines? 645. had sex within such confines? 646. necked/petted inside or within the confines of a cave, rock overhang, a well, or any other secluded, outdoor, non-vegetative shielding structure? 647. had oral sex within such confines? 648. had sex within such confines? 649. had sexual activity in a household room other than the bedroom (kitchen, hallway, living room)? 650. had sexual activity on the floor? 651. had sexual activity on a piece of furniture not normally used for resting humans on (i. e. microwave, washing machine, TV [acrobatic aren't you])? 652. had sex on the beach? (and the resultant sand in uncomfortable places) 653. had sex on a waterbed? (surf's up!) 654. had sex in front of or under a mirror? 655. had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation in a public bathroom of the opposite sex? 656. gone to a motel (however sleazy) for the sole purpose of having sex? Section 7: Style. 657. put an ad in the persons to persons? 658. put an ad for a sex partner? 659. answered an ad for a sex partner? 660. been to a "public bath"? 661. patronized a prostitute? 662. been to a "massage parlor"? 663. sent a strip o gram? 664. done a strip tease for someone? 665. sexually harassed someone (e. g. made unwanted sexual advances)? 666. forced or coerced someone into having intimate physical relations with you? 667. wife-(or husband)swapped? (swapped significant other) 668. wanted to trade them in for a working model? 669. committed adultery? (you need not have been the one who was married to get this point.) 670. been cited in divorce proceedings as the other woman/man? 671. tasted your own sexual fluids? 672. tasted another's sexual fluids? 673. considered sperm a protein supplement? 674. complimented someone on their taste? 675. been complimented on your taste? 676. searched for the G-spot or had someone search for your G-spot? 677. searched for the G-spot and found it, or had someone find your G-spot? 678. been unable to share a bed, sleeping bag, or sleeping accommodations with someone of your prefered sex without something steamy happening? 679. given a sympathy fuck? 680. offered a sympathy fuck, and been rejected? 681. received money or some favor to have sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with someone? 682. given money or some favor to have sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with someone? 683. always accepted sex (never refused it regardless of race, creed, color, religion, age, gender or condition)? 684. initiated sex with someone for the sake of sex only? 685. tongue bathed someone? 686. been tongue bathed? 687. foot masturbated someone? 688. been foot masturbated? 689. licked or sucked on someone else's feet and/or toes? 690. had your feet and/or toes licked or sucked by someone else? 691. actually measured your own or someone else's penis? (i.e., actually grabbed a ruler, yardstick, tape measure, etc.) 692. asked about a guy: '. . is he hung'? 693. used a feather or any other tickling device for the purpose of tickling? 694. used tickling as a form of arousal? 695. used your hair for the sexual arousal of others (beards count)? 696. used hot wax for sexual purposes? 697. used ice for sexual purposes? 698. used ice or something frozen as a dildo? (ice cubes don't count here- icicles, popsicles, and the like. Penetration.) 699. used a strap-on dildo or male extension sheath? 700. used whipped cream for sexual purposes? 701. used household syrup, sandwich spreading, oil, salad dressing, or any like substances for sexual purposes? 702. put food, gravy, syrup, salad dressing, candy, peanut butter, honey, or anything else edible on your partner's body and then eaten it? 703. had sex to music (keep the beat)? 704. had sex with a sunburn (the bright ouchie type)? 705. had sex while still clothed ('down with trousers, up with dresses!')? 706. had sex without the use of birth control devices? (Use of the rhythm, prayer, and hope methods counts as "without the use of birth control devices".) 707. had sex with a religious officiary? (Priest, nun, mother-superior, cardinal, pope, deity, etc.) 708. had sex with someone whose name you didn't know at the time? 709. had sex with someone whose name you still don't know? 710. had sex with someone whose name you don't remember? 711. had sex with someone whose language you don't (or didn't) know? 712. had sex with someone whose name you didn't want to know? 713. had sex with someone whose face you never saw? 714. had sex and later wished you hadn't? 715. had sexual activity with someone ten or more years younger than you? 716. had sexual activity with someone ten or more years older than you? 717. had sex with someone half your age? 718. had sex with someone twice your age? 719. lied about how old you were for purposes of sexual activity? 720. had sex with someone of a race not your own? 721. had sex with someone for revenge (on them, on their current or ex-, on your current or ex-)? 722. had sex while either you or your partner, but not both, were under the legal age of consent of the state in which you were having sex? 723. been involved in breast fucking? (a.k.a. "The Hawaiian Muscle Fuck") 724. participated in fist-fucking? (see "Caligula") 725. been bruised during sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? (hickeys do not count) 726. bruised someone else during sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? 727. been injured during sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? 728. inflicted pain during sex? 729. had pain inflicted during sex? 730. been a screamer? 731. made your partner scream during sex? 732. fainted as a result of orgasm (give them a stud point!)? 733. had your partner faint during intercourse or oral sex as a result of orgasm (take a stud point!)? 734. fallen asleep during sex? 735. had your partner fall asleep during sex? 736. had a quickie (sex or oral sex to orgasm in under 10 minutes)? 737. had sex for more than three hours in a single session of sex? 738. orgasmed more than three times in one session of sex? 739. had sex so many times or so long that one or both people involved runs dry? 740. had sex doggie fashion? 741. had sex in the female superior position? 742. had sex sitting up? 743. had sex standing up? 744. had sex upside-down? 745. gone through two or more sexual positions without the need for re-entry? 746. had sex more than 10 times with 1 person? 747. had sex more than 5 times in a 24 hour period? 748. had sex more than 10 times in a 24 hour period? 749. performed oral sex after intercourse without washing or douching? 750. kissed your partner on the lips after oral sex without brushing teeth, nor washing/gargling/rinsing out mouth? 751. gone out in public after sex or oral sex without bathing? 752. been involved in the use of a penis as a leash or bludgeoning device? 753. been involved in oxygen deprivation for sexual enhancement? (Nitrous oxide does not count.) 754. been late to work, class or an appointment because you were involved in sexual activity? 755. had an orgasm the same time as your partner (simultaneous)? 756. faked orgasm (guys too)? 757. told them they were great when they weren't? 758. had a one night stand? 759. ignored someone because you didn't want to admit you had had sex with them? 760. implied having had sex with someone when you hadn't? 761. denied having sex with someone when you had (not telling your parents is merely survival)? 762. been walked in on while having sex? 763. walked in on others having sex? (committed an "oops") 764. walked in on others having sex and then joined in? 765. physically watched people having sex? 766. invited others to watch you having sex with someone? 767. accepted an invitation to watch sexual activity? 768. had sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation knowing that someone was watching you? 769. fantasized about someone else other than your partner when you were engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? 770. exited through a window because someone came home unexpectedly? 771. walked in on your partner of choice having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with someone else? 772. watched your partner of choice having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with someone else? 773. taken pictures or made video tapes of your partner of choice having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation with someone else? 774. willingly made audio recordings while having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? 775. willingly made video tapes or had pictures taken while having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? 776. talked dirty while having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation? 777. intentionally made more noise than necessary while having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation so as to put on a good show for whoever might have been listening in? 778. intentionally listened in onto other people having sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation without their knowing it? 779. disturbed other people by the making of excessive noise while having sex? 780. had a general emergency arise while you were steeped in sex? ( house on fire, flash flood, private plane crash lands in your dwelling, etc.) 781. had your sexual technique/style/skill openly praised by someone? 782. bought condoms? 783. borrowed/stolen/taken birth control devices from your or someone else's parents? (Condom's, spermicidal foam, diaphragms, chastity belt.) 784. comparison shopped for condoms (plain or ribbed)? 785. chosen a condom or spermicide for its taste (or lack of)? 786. bought condoms by the case (wholesale, not just the 'family pack')? 787. bought any other birth control item (contraceptive jelly or foam, or the pill)? 788. bought any other birth control item in bulk (the Pill, unless you got it for more than one month at a time, doesn't count)? 789. handed out condoms as party favors? 790. discussed favorite brand of condom? 791. inflated a condom? 792. carried a condom 'just in case'? 793. used a non-normal solution as a contraceptive douche (Coke, beer, etc.)? 794. thought you might be, or might have caused someone to else to be, unintentionally pregnant? 795. bought a home pregnancy test? 796. had, or given someone an unwanted pregnancy? 797. lied about being pregnant or about having made someone pregnant? 798. deliberately failed to pay child support? 799. contracted mono? 800. thought you had a sexually transmitted disease (STD)? 801. had a STD of any sort? (STDs: i.e. the clap, crabs, herpes, Aids, etc.) 802. had sex with someone knowing you had been exposed to a STD? 803. had sex with someone knowing they had been exposed to a STD? 804. had an AIDS test due to reasonable suspicion or hyperactive imagination? Section 8: The Kinky Stuff. 805. engaged in heterosexual activity (with a member of the opposite sex)? 806. engaged in homosexual activity (with a member of your sex)? 807. engaged in bisexual activity (defined here as sexual activity with both genders on a relatively even ratio for the period of time in question)? 808. engaged in incestuous activity (with a member of your family)? 809. engaged in homosexual incest (with a member of your family and gender)? 810. engaged in bestiality (sex with non-humans, not the merely sub human)? 811. engaged in pedophillia (sexual activity with pre-teenage children)? 812. engaged in bondage ('voluntarily', you had some control on initiation)? 813. engaged in transvesticism? 814. engaged in sadism? 815. engaged in masochism? 816. engaged in domination? 817. engaged in submission? 818. engaged in cocrophilia? (Marked interest in excrement; esp. use of feces or filth for sexual excitement) 819. engaged in frotteurism? (Masturbation by rubbing against another person The need to rub against another stranger.) 820. engaged in infantilism (a dependency on the sight or feeling of diapers or of being diapered; a dependency on being dressed and treated as a baby)? 821. engaged in klismaphilia?(A dependency on being given an enema) 822. engaged in mysophilia? (dependency on something soiled or filthy, such as sweaty underwear or used menstrual pads)? 823. engaged in scoptophilia? (A dependency on looking at sexual organs and watching sexual activity openly, not surreptitiously, as in voyeurism)? 824. engaged in urophilia? (Being dependently responsive to the smell or taste of urine or the sight and sound of someone urinating) 825. engaged in role-playing (nurse-patient, teacher-student, border guard well endowed co-ed, etc.)? 826. been a foot fetishist to any degree? 827. been a leather fetishist to any degree? 828. been a rubber/latex fetishist to any degree? 829. been a voyeur? 830. been an exhibitionist? 831. worn edible underwear/lingerie? 832. eaten edible underwear/lingerie off of someone? 833. worn a leather/gore suit? 834. worn diapers for a sexual or masturbatory purpose? 835. been diapered by someone else for a sexual or masturbatory purpose? 836. used a ball gag or other manufactured gag? 837. worn a collar and/or leash? 838. found a prepubescent child sexually attractive/arousing? 839. had sexual contact of any kind with a prepubescent child? 840. been on the receiving end of anal sex? 841. been on the ramming end of anal sex? 842. been involved in cunnilingus during the woman's period? 843. had sex during the woman's period? 844. had your anus licked? 845. licked someone's anus? 846. licked someone's anus while they were defecating? 847. performed oral sex while the person was urinating? 848. drank blood? 849. drank your own urine? 850. tasted or drank someone else's urine? 851. drank/drained an entire bladder-full of someone else's urine? 852. tasted someone else's nasal mucous? 853. inserted food into yours or someone else's anus? 854. eaten food after it was extracted/evacuated from yours or someone else's anus? 855. eaten a lab dissection? 856. given your cat or dog a mohawk or a punk hairdo? 857. dyed a pet strange colors (green, purple, hot pink)? 858. fed live animals to pets (e.g. baby chicks to the pit bull)? 859. been to a dog or cock fight? 860. mutilated any living animal or creature for your pleasure? 861. inserted a small animal or creature into your rectum? (Either alive or dead) 862. had sex in the presence of animals? 863. had a family pet or domesticated animal walk over you or your partner while you were involved in sex or oral sex? 864. watched animals having sex? 865. been aroused by the sight of animals having sex? 866. had sex or oral sex with your (dead) dinner animal? 867. attempted to have sex, oral sex, or (mutual) masturbation with a live animal, but failed? 868. had sex with a live animal? (Any size) 869. received oral sex from a live animal? (Any size) 870. gave oral sex to a live animal? (Any size) 871. masturbated a live animal? (Any size) 872. had sex, oral sex, or (mutual) masturbation with a single type of animal more than once? (Alive or dead) 873. had sex, oral sex, or (mutual) masturbation with an animal in the presence of 1 or more other people? Section 9: Bondage. 874. tied up a masochist and refused to cause them pain (its called cruel)? 875. improvised bondage extemporaneously during sexual activity (e. g. holding someone's wrists over their head)? 876. been tied up for erotic purposes (ropes, scarves, ties)? 877. been tied up and had sex? 878. been tied up and masturbated upon? 879. been tied up knowing you might be seen by others? 880. been tied up with the intention of being seen by others? 881. tied someone up for erotic purposes? 882. tied someone up and had sex with them? 883. tied someone up and masturbated on them? 884. had nude pictures of yourself taken? 885. taken nude pictures of someone else? 886. tied someone up and shown them to others? 887. been bound in chains? 888. been bound and had someone whip you? 889. been whipped until you bled? 890. had your nose pierced? 891. had your tongue pierced? 892. had your lips pierced? 893. had your other lips pierced (or penis)? 894. had your nipples pierced? 895. fantasized of being tied up for erotic purposes? 896. fantasized of tying someone up for erotic purposes? 897. fantasized of tying someone up to show them to others? 898. shaved someone else's pubic hair? 899. pierced someone else's nose? 900. pierced someone else's lips? 901. pierced someone else's tongue? 902. pierced someone else's other lips (or penis)? 903. pierced someone else's nipples? 904. bound someone in chains (handcuffs, leg irons or plain chain)? 905. bound someone and whipped them? 906. whipped someone until they bled? 907. bought bondage & discipline literature? 908. read "The Story of O"? 909. seen the movie "The Story of O"? 910. posed for B&D drawings? 911. posed for B&D photographs? 912. asked someone to pose for B&D drawings? 913. asked someone to pose for B&D photographs? 914. asked someone to pose for B&D movies? Section 10: Drugs. 915. smoked tobacco? (cigarette, pipe, cigar, hookah) 916. chewed tobacco? (snuff) 917. had an alcoholic drink? 918. been intoxicated? 919. thrown up from having drunk too much alcohol? 920. passed out from having drunk too much alcohol? 921. spiked a punch with alcohol? 922. bought or drank 'moonshine'? 923. brewed your own moonshine? 924. chugged alcohol? 925. had alcohol for breakfast? 926. gargled with hard liquor (No more mediciny breath!)? 927. driven while intoxicated or high? 928. bought alcohol for minors? 929. had someone buy you alcohol while you were still a minor? 930. lied about how old you were in order to obtain alcohol? 931. bought your own alcohol while still a minor? 932. been drunk while still a minor? 933. been hung over? 934. had a hangover last more than one days? 935. been intoxicated (high) from some other drug? 936. been intoxicated from a controlled or illicit drug? 937. used over the counter drugs for purposes of getting intoxicated? 938. taken any drug that you weren't sure what it was, just to find out what it does (foolish you)? 939. taken stimulants? 940. taken depressants excluding alcohol? 941. inhaled nitrous oxide while not visiting a dentist? 942. inhaled anything containing butyl nitrate (sniffed glue)? 943. injected any non-prescription drug into yourself? 944. injected more than one non-prescription drug simultaneously into yourself? 945. injected any non-prescription drug into someone else? 946. injected more than one non-prescription drug simultaneously into someone else? 947. spiked a punch with a drug other than alcohol? 948. taken Ecstasy/X? 949. taken PCP or other veterinary drug? 950. taken any synthetic hallucinogen (MDA, STP, Deep Purple, or Sandoz)? 951. ingested any 'natural' hallucinogen (peyote, mescaline, 'shrooms, ergot)? 952. taken hallucinogens for enlightenment, or other philosophical reason? 953. taken valium? 954. smoked marijuana/sensemilia? 955. eaten marijuana/sensemilia? 956. taken opiate in any form? 957. used cocaine? 958. smoked crack? 959. freebased? 960. done speed or meth-amphetamine? 961. had a bad trip? 962. gotten a bad batch? 963. taken any 'designer' drugs? 964. used the list of controlled drugs as a checklist (USC title 21, sec 812)? 965. used prescription drugs that you didn't 'need' or have the prescription for ('abused' a controlled substance)? 966. deliberately injured yourself so as to obtain medication? 967. made any food item with drugs added? (hash brownies, Everclear Jello, etc.)? 968. eaten any food item with drugs added? 969. drugged someone without their knowledge and/or consent? (hash brownies and the like.) 970. introduced someone to 'drugs' in general? 971. introduced someone to a new (to them) drug? 972. made or synthesized your own drugs? 973. made or synthesized drugs, 'commercially' (been the lab)? 974. grown your own? (marijuana, opium poppies) 975. bred your own? (produces better varieties) 976. bought a controlled or illicit drug? 977. sold a controlled or illicit drug? 978. sold a non-drug item as a controlled or illicit drug (burned somebody)? 979. bought a controlled or illicit drug in bulk for personal use? 980. sold possessions in order to obtain drugs? 981. played any games in which there was a mystery as to who would be getting drugs and who wouldn't, yet everybody plays in it (e.g."Who's got the pill, where half of the cups (of soda) have LSD in them and the other half don't, and everybody picks a cup and drinks it and wonders who gets lucky.) 982. gone to class or work while under the influence of drugs? (alcohol counts.) 983. mixed drugs? (alcohol counts. mixed meaning being under the influence of two or more drugs at once.) 984. used any drug when you were too wasted to know if it had any effect (e. g. smoked pot while blitzed)? 985. used a commercial aphrodisiac? (Spanish Fly, Magic Love Drops, powdered rhino horn, etc.) 986. used alcohol to lower someone else's inhibitions for the intent of sex or oral sex? 987. used drugs to lower someone else's inhibitions for the intent of sex or oral sex? 988. had sex while under the influence of nitrous? 989. had an orgasm while under the influence of nitrous? (difficult because of timing.) 990. had sex while under the influence of cocaine? 991. had sex while under the influence of marijuana/sensemilia? 992. had sex while under the influence of Ecstasy/X? 993. had sex while under the influence of PCP or other vet. drug? 994. had sex while under the influence of LSD, peyote, or psilocybin? 995. had sex while under the influence of any hallucinogen? 996. had sex while under the influence of drugs with a partner who did not realize you were on them? 997. been told you had sex the night before and you can't recall a thing? 998. woken the next morning wondering what you did? 999. woken the next morning wondering where you were? 1000. woken the next morning wondering who you were? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I. Scoring Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a sheet of paper containing lots of itty-bitty answers to the Purity Test. Sworn to excellence of workmanship, we now give you directions on how to calculate your Purity score. There are several methods; the calculator method works best. Also there is the a la mainframe method. (A DEC Station-5000 works great as a PC.) Scoring method: Count "yes" answers. Subtract that number from 1000. Divide the result by 10. The result is your percentage purity. The higher the number, the more pure you are; in the same vein, the lower the score, the more of a sleaze bag you are. For your reference, we include calculator directions: For people with real calculators (HP): (# of NO answers) [ENTER] 10 / For people with other (dinky) calculators: (# of NO answers) / 10= ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- II> Warranty Information We hope that you have enjoyed this test. It does not come with a warranty, nor does it guarantee that it will get you laid or make you somehow somewhat better in bed or in the haystack. The makers of this test are not responsible for any liabilities or damages resulting from this test, including but not limited to, paternity suits. Ask your doctor or pharmacist. Do not open back panel; no user serviceable parts inside. Propagate (this test) at will, even without the written permission of the publisher; just don't edit or change it. In reproducing this test, the authors of this test may exercise droit de seigneur over you, your immediate family, or fiance(e). You may or may not have additional rights which may vary from state to state (i.e. inebriated, ecstasy). Not recommended for children under twelve. Parental guidance discouraged and frowned upon. Pencils, additional paper, and batteries not included. Some assembly may be required. Does not come with any other figures. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Drive carefully; 90% of the people in the world are caused by accidents. 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